Flah Larken 333 admits to oxidane use, addiction

Knocto 333 The Sports Planet (Sagittarius Journal) –-  The world of sports was stunned to learn that beloved Catch the Purple Fuzzies All-Star player Flah Larken 333 admitted to oxidane use at a recent press conference.

The press conference was set up after speculation that Flah Larken’s many victories were due to performance enhancing substances.  The conference was expected to be a standard denial followed by misdirection.

Gotta catch them all.

A purple fuzzy

“I need oxidane, I truly cannot live without it.  It doesn’t give me any performance enhancement in anyway.  It’s a part of my body.”  Admitted Larken.

“This is so sad.  We are witnessing one of our greatest players in the late stages of a horrible addiction.”  Psied noted sports psychologist _,–,__–,,-.

Miff beats out Spoo!

Jassag Tran:  The ultra-flavalicious capital (Sagittarius Journal) — In recent taste tests, chunky and delicious Miff beat out the great taste of Spoo amongst 7 of 9 intelligent species.

Best Leader Dies!

(Andromedia) — An entire planet scrambled into action as their best leader was found unresponsive earlier today.

What you need to know about afterlife providers

Scenic Valhalla

(Andromedia) – Who came first and who scored the worst…  Of the best.

Zeeba Mining Co. found guilty!

Illegal strip mining of a moon

Evidence of illegal strip mining operation.

Spiny The Elder  (Orion Arm Star) – It was the stunning twist to a story eons in the making, Zeeba Mining Co. and associates have been found guilty of widespread environmental infractions ranging from illegal moon alteration to galactic wind diversion.

Eh Eh-Eh Eh! E! E! E! E!

Whatever

Yeah, whatever

(EEEEEEEEEEEE) — K’k'k’k'k’k'k’k'k’k'k’k'k’k'k’k'k’k eeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEE? eh’eh’eh’eh-eh-eh click, click, click, eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?

“Zzzzzzzzz, t, t, t’t't’t't’t, eeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEzzzzzzzzzzzzz.”  Click, click, click, click, EEEEEEEEEE?eeeeeeeMMM.

Vek’malkh: Welcomed as latest type 2 civilization

Accepted into local 2 confederation

 

Not authorized to view this picture

A perfect example of (translation redacted)

(Andromedia) — Ever since the invention of the (translation redacted).  Engineers and scientists have worked tirelessly to implement it.  With that, the Vek’malkh have left their neighbors behind as they now have been recognized as a type 2 civilization.  Although communication between the Vek’malkh and their neighbors is prohibited, trade is still legal but now heavily regulated.

M-Brane Theory and Sunspots to perform at Galactic Central

Galactic Central Point (Sagittarius Journal) – The Wasdani GC is expecting a sellout crowd as fan favorites M-Brane Theory are to open for Sunspots in the next Gilfod.

“The spawn love M-Brane Theory for their hip frequencies.”  Chromasigned stadium owner Yellow Yellow Blue Dot Green Stripe Vertical.  “Sunspots is probably the best magician in the cluster, the combination is unbeatable!” She added with a hint of yellow.

Companies move closer to DTDA implementation

 

It's probably best you don't ask

You were going to ask the relevance of this picture but now you probably don't want to know.

(Andromedia) – While any civilized organization above the intelligence of ground selenite doesn’t discriminate against any individual for its mode of reproduction, companies are moving towards a DTDA policy.

Leaks of leaks leaked!

By: 00110111 00100000 00110000 00100111 00111001
What something rotten might look like

One of the many garments you can download in your spare time.

Historic Crab Nebula (The Perseus Gazette) – In an embarrassment to statesthings everywhere as leaks of leaks leaked out to the press from the contents of vacuoles to the oozes of unknown nethers.  A galactic hacker known as “Ass-Stainge” got a hold of the laundry service (or equivalent) from various heads of state or other leaking parts of their bodies and posted them to the replicator net.